Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Moderators: YAK_Chewie, Yakface.com Staff

User avatar
Darth Kikinou
Sith Lord
Posts: 3316
Joined: Tue Oct 24, 2006 6:04 pm

Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby Darth Kikinou » Fri Dec 31, 2010 2:43 am

Here is part 1 of Episode iii of The Guardians of Peace and Justice folks! I hope you enjoy it!!

Image

The Wutandi research and development space station...



Image

Site of assembly lines for astromech droids,



Image

Industrial purpose machines,



Image

and specialization models.



Image

In the operations center of the station, a computer systems contractor approaches the technical administrator.



Image

"If you'll just sign here, here, and here Mister Lydecker we'll be all finished."



Image

"Excellent Miss Taw, looks good."



Image

"There is one thing before I go, my droid's receiver here isn't working, any way you could get one of your technicians to look at it?"



Image

"But of course Miss Taw."



Image

At that moment a maintenance worker rides past them in a trolley.



Image

Administrator Lydecker sees him and says "Jif! I need you to take Miss Taw to astromech repair."



Image

The Snivvian worker groans "But sir, I was just about to go to the mess hall for my break!"



Image

"You're always on break," Lydecker sneers, "you better get..."



Image

Miss Taw interrupts the administrator's scolding, saying "Actually I could use a bite myself, mind if I join you Jif?"



Image

Jif excitedly responds "Oh definitely Miss! Hop on!"



Image

After putting the faulty astromech droid on the trolley, they head down a long corridor.



Image

Jif tells his guest "Thanks for saving me from Mister Lydecker, Miss Taw!"



Image

"Call me Nomi," she says, "Hey this thing goes much faster than I'd have thought!"



Image

"Snorrrt! Oink! Snort!" Jif laughs, betraying his Snivvian species' porcine roots, "Well I'm a nerf herder most of the year so this is fun for me!"



Image

Nomi jokes "Yea I thought you were a little too stuck-up to be just a cleanup guy!"



Image

Jif reacts with glee and responds "Oink! Snorrrt! Well, usually I'm told I'm scruffy-looking, so thanks!"



Image

Meanwhile, in a highly restricted area of the station, secret research work is taking place...



Image

A Scientist proclaims "A cerebral cortex encased in a highly-efficient droid body will mark the biggest advance in the history of cybernetics!!"



Image

"Yes Professor Rotwang," his assistant replies, "all parameters are within acceptable limits."



Image

"Excellent, my dear Yutan. Viceroy Gunray assures me the brain's donor was a brilliant strategist, a subject worthy of this project."



Image

As the surgical droids fuse the last of the connections between the brain and the droid circuitry, the scientist continues "Prepare to power on the reactor Yutan!"



Image

All things being ready, professor Rotwang melodramatically commands "Let there be life!!!"



Image

The cyborg's body begins to twitch, prompting the professor to demand "More power Yutan!"



Image

"More power Yutan, full power!!"



Image

As the cyborg's eyes open the professor yells "It's alive! ALIVE!! Muahahahahahahahaha!!!"



Image

Yutan interrupts the professor's maniacal laughter and says "Professor, the cerebral activity is off the charts!!"



Image

"Adjust the serotonin levels to compensate, reduce the power," the scientist orders.



Image

Yutan panics "The controls are off-line, I've been locked out Professor!!"



Image

Suddenly Professor Rotwang finds himself being approached in an aggressive manner by the normally docile droids in the laboratory...



Image

The scientist and his assistant are violently assaulted.



Image

Meanwhile, as Nomi Taw's droid is undergoing a diagnostics scan...



Image

Lights flicker and screams are heard from all directions.



Image

All across the station workers are accosted by droids...



Image

Working in unison to assault their caretakers...



Image

Twisting arms and breaking bones...



Image

No staff member in the vicinity of a droid of any kind is spared...



Image

A nightmare has been unleashed.



Image

But in space, no one can hear you scream.



Image

Days later, on the planet Geonosis...



Image

On the dusty plains where the Petranaki arena stands...



Image

A gala spectacle is taking place.



Image

Geonosians from the highest castes are in attendance of the games...



Image

presented by the archduke of Geonosis,



Image

Poggle the Lesser.



Image

As the crowd partakes in the brutal execution of beggars and thieves,



Image

the archduke's elite guests enjoy the events from the dignitaries box.



Image

Politicians, businessmen, and royalty...



Image

making connections and discussing mutual interests.



Image

The obscene spectacle of wampas torturing the lowest of the low is the backdrop for a conversation of the highest importance...



Image

between Senator Palpatine from the sovereign system of Naboo and the Viceroy of the Trade Federation, Nute Gunray.



Image

The Viceroy laments "The office of the Chancellor and the Jedi Temple are insisting on sending their own investigative teams to our research station."



Image

"They haven't given you the chance to send your own team in first?" Palpatine asks.



Image

Gunray replies "We did send one but we lost contact with them almost immediately after they arrived on site..."



Image

As a poor Geonosian is dismembered by wild beasts, Gunray continues "We don't know what's going on, over there. I am concerned, however, that our proprietary technologies under development might be compromised, you know how meddlesome the Jedi are..."



Image

"Indeed I do Viceroy. Perhaps I could arrange for a special forces team from Naboo to handle the investigation, I can assure you they would be more... cooperative, to your interests."



Image

As a nexu devours another prisoner, Palpatine continues "As for the Jedi, I find it exceptionally difficult to have the senate limit their jurisdiction..."



Image

And as the games turn to beast battles he laments "The Chancellor can be persuaded to cede his navy's jurisdiction from time to time, but Master Yoda seems to have the unique power to veto any of his decisions..."



Image

"That is something I plan to change, in due time."



Image

As a wampa spectacularly slams a nexu to the ground while another is torn apart by various beasts,



Image

Viceroy Gunray responds "We will be most appreciative for your assistance Senator."



Image

As the two continue their conversation, the archduke oversees the preparations for the final event.



Image

Gunray then says "I can assure you that the Trade Federation will not forget this when it comes time for your re-election campaign, Senator."



Image

Palpatine concludes the conversation saying "One good turn deserves another, Viceroy."



Image

The scene having been set for the main event, the distinguished guests all turn their attention to the arena.



Image

The top gladiators from all across the galaxy...



Image

All champions of their sectors...



Image

are here to challenge the champion for his title.



Image

The one they simply call "The Zabrak"



Image

Senator Palpatine, having secretly become the Sith Lord DARTH SIDIOUS, looks upon the warrior and senses a strong presence in the Force within him.



Image

The gladiators line up and speak in unison "We who are about to die, salute you!"



Image

The archduke acknowledges the gladiators and gestures for the match to start.



Image

The challengers' strategy becomes instantly clear as they surround the champion.



Image

Suddenly two swordsmen attack the Zabrak,



Image

but he blocks both swords in one move with his dual-bladed staff.



Image

The Zabrak's violent counter-attack to one of the swordsmen is repelled by a shield, knocking it to the ground...



Image

and as the other swordsman attacks again, the Zabrak lunges down...



Image

and slices his opponents neck, severing his jugular vein and dropping him to the ground.



Image

As the rest of the gladiators quickly converge, the Zabrak leaps high into the air, plunging his staff into the shoulder of the other swordsman, effectively turning it into a vaulting pole and a deadly impalement stake, simultaneously.



Image

As the Zabrak makes an acrobatic landing away from his opponents,



Image

a masked gladiator turns and cracks his bantha whip and snags the Zabrak's leg.



Image

As his captor pulls him in and the other gladiators rush in to execute him,



Image

the Zabrak reaches out and arms himself with the weapon of one of the fallen swordsmen.



Image

With tremendous agility he moves to avoid the thrust of a trident and turns to parry a violent blow from another swordsman,



Image

and in the same motion he slides and slashes his captor's chest.



Image

Surely this warrior has the Force behind him.



Image

The mighty champion rises to his feet, picks up another sword, and stares down his remaining opponents...



Image

who stand bewildered at their opponent's prowess.



Image

The crowd roars with delight...



Image

as the Zabrak entertains them by effortlessly spinning his swords.



Image

The gladiators, humiliated by the Zabrak's arrogance, regain their composure and set out determined to earn the title for themselves.



Image

A masked reptilian violently throws his trident at the Zabrak,



Image

but the champion is too quick.



Image

Instead he lunges forward and as he incredibly leaps past the whipping chain of an opponent...



Image

he audaciously positions himself right in front of the stocky chainman...



Image

and expertly slices off his head with both swords in one motion.



Image

It is the brutal work of a formidable warrior and an act of astonishing showmanship.



Image

As the defeated gladiator's head rolls on the ground...



Image

the Zabrak sets his sights on the remaining two challengers and attacks them.



Image

He is met with fierce resistance from both, exchanging blows with both of them simultaneously.



Image

As the Zabrak kicks the reptilian in the chest, sending him to the ground, the iron-armed warrior grabs the Zabrak's sword by the blade and discards it.



Image

Taken aback and reduced to a single sword, the Zabrak fights to repel the iron-armed warrior's attacks.



Image

With stunning agility, the Zabrak swoops underneath the iron-armed warrior's sword and thrusts his own sword up into his opponent's neck, lodging it into his skull.



Image

And then there were two. The reptilian gladiator and the Zabrak, both having been disarmed, stare each other down.



Image

The reptilian rushes in to engage the Zabrak in hand-to-hand combat.



Image

The combat is brutal and after several minutes of fighting, the reptilian gets the upper hand and pins the Zabrak to the ground.



Image

In spite of being in a choke-hold, the Zabrak manages to kick his formidable opponent off of him with tremendous force.



Image

Before the reptilian warrior even has time to gain his footing the Zabrak grabs him from behind...



Image

and breaks his neck with a precise and powerful twist.



Image

The reptilian falls to the ground, the Zabrak is victorious.



Image

The crowd roars with approval of the entertaining spectacle they have just witnessed,



Image

the Zabrak bathes in their applause.



Image

The champion then turns to the dignitaries box and bows.



Image

The distinguished guests are pleased, and the archduke provides the gesture that signals the Zabrak is to live to fight another day.



Image

As the champion reveals himself,



Image

Palpatine knows that he has found his apprentice.



Image

It has been a tremendous spectacle.


Read part 2 --> http://www.yakfaceforums.com/phpBB3/viewtopic.php?f=71&t=6130#p96955
Last edited by Darth Kikinou on Fri Feb 22, 2013 1:59 am, edited 5 times in total.
----------------------------------------------------
http://www.photonovelalliance.com
The Guardians of Peace and Justice
Episode iii: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5
User avatar
julianmaurice
Rebel / Imperial Pilot
Posts: 840
Joined: Thu Aug 28, 2008 8:33 pm
Location: Leeds, UK
Contact:

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby julianmaurice » Fri Dec 31, 2010 5:27 am

DK, very impressive pieceof work.

Firstly I really enjoyed the read, right from the start I was hooked, and the speech between characters is very well written.

The Gladiator battle was my favourite part, and the combination of images and text worked very well. You also added a vital piece of Star Wars lore into your story, a real treat for any Star Wars fan, and a brave move.

I was a little unsure of inclusion of the Franenstien name at first, but taken in context with the rest of the story it added some comic relief, and the whole sequence was very well done.

Your Geonosis set was also excellent, and was a delight to see.

This is a proper Photo Novel and slots well with Chewies and other works on the forum. I applaud your effort and really look forward to more...Thanks for all of the hard work!

Jules
Image
User avatar
YAK_Chewie
Forum Admin
Posts: 22505
Joined: Sun May 07, 2006 4:18 am
Contact:

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby YAK_Chewie » Fri Dec 31, 2010 11:46 am

Whoo hoo!!! Glad to see this posted! Will check it out in full detail soon (most likely this weekend), have a really busy day today. But just by glancing at it, it looks awesome!

:wink:
User avatar
Darth Depressis
Rebel / Imperial Trooper
Posts: 726
Joined: Fri Dec 01, 2006 4:38 pm
Location: La Habra, CA
Contact:

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby Darth Depressis » Fri Dec 31, 2010 8:06 pm

here we go again!....i'll give a detailed review sometime after the new year. happy to see this made 2010.
User avatar
YAK_Chewie
Forum Admin
Posts: 22505
Joined: Sun May 07, 2006 4:18 am
Contact:

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby YAK_Chewie » Sun Jan 02, 2011 5:41 pm

That was simply awesome, just read through it and really enjoyed it! Will give some more detailed feedback before too long, but have to say right now that the thought and planning that went into this is astounding!

:wink:
User avatar
The Professor
Forum Admin
Posts: 2457
Joined: Tue Aug 01, 2006 4:45 pm
Location: Northwest Florida

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby The Professor » Tue Jan 04, 2011 12:14 am

GREAT, great alternate history. It was lovely seeing all the pieces come together. The beginning scene at the lab was my favorite. I loved the little character interactions and seeing the birth of Grievous. The Frankenstein angle was very appropriate.

And, now I get to see that Geonosis diorama put to good use. Another great, unique story for the birth of a major character. Seeing young Palpatine topped it off. Great work!
Chewie, take The Professor in back and plug him into the hyperdrive!
tokiravensky
Cantina Bartender
Posts: 448
Joined: Tue Jul 27, 2010 3:21 pm

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby tokiravensky » Tue Jan 04, 2011 12:36 am

dude, thats awesome. great job. it was beautifully done. I love all of the sets you used.
User avatar
YAK_Chewie
Forum Admin
Posts: 22505
Joined: Sun May 07, 2006 4:18 am
Contact:

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby YAK_Chewie » Tue Jan 04, 2011 5:39 pm

Ok - after reading this all the way through, I must say that I enjoyed this as much as any photonovel I have ever read. I really hope that more people take the time to do so - it's a fantastic read and you deserve high marks for this amazing effort.

There are only a couple of minor drawbacks in my opinion... a few pictures appear a bit too grainy (hard to avoid that, depending on the camera you have) and I think when you show staples holding up some of the wall printouts, it takes away from your otherwise amazing looking scenery.

The opening scenes showing the station look realy good, it gives a great sense of depth with the station. It's awesome seeing so many different rooms, it makes the whole area seem less confined than what I usually end up doing. The introduction with Nomi Taw was well done, and I love how Jiff strolls up to her in the trolley cart with the droid parts in the back. Well done... and Jiff looks hilarious in that role, really amusing.

Now, the Grievous scene is awesome and perfectly corny at the same time... it's freaking great. I love "Eyegore" and "Frunkinsteen" - nice names... the whole thing reminds me of a Simpsons Halloween special, lol. But it really is cool too, so I hope you take that the right way... and love how the droids become feral! That's fantastic! But is Nomi's droid supposed to be R2-D2? Interested to see how that plays out... and the last shot of Grievous looks great.

The Arena scene on Geonosis is also awesome... such a great fight between Darth Maul and all the contestents, I really enjoyed it! It's clear that the diorama you made really is a work of art, it truly makes that scene so much better... I am so glad you made your own custom arena for this scene. Such hard work, but it pays off here and makes this scene spectacular... and love that gladiator with the helmet used from Hoth Han... very nice.

At the end, it was nice to see Nouk Kii again, all grown up now. It seemed like Nute Gunray had the upper hand in the conversation though, which kind of surprised me given how cowardly he is in the TPM... but hey, that's okay. He probably saw the Jedi as young and felt he could have things his way. It's also interesting how at this point it makes it look like the Trade Federation and Naboo are seemingly allies... little do they know that both are being manipulated by Palpatine... hell, the whole galaxy ends up being used by him. Such a cool character. :twisted:

Anuways, awesome work Phil... this is truly a fantastic series and I know and appreciate how much work you're putting into it.

:wink:
User avatar
DanOfTheDead
Moderator
Posts: 1204
Joined: Fri Jul 13, 2007 4:23 pm

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby DanOfTheDead » Tue Jan 04, 2011 7:07 pm

Once you'd established a few of your more humorous scenes and references, I knew to expect them and found them much more enjoyable. The first few were a little jarring to my suspesion of disbelief, but I thought they were pretty well done once I understood them to be part of the tone.

The alternate take on events is rather interesting, and I like the introduction of Maul through the arena battle.

I don't want to step on any toes, but I did want to suggest when you run into a problem where you can't get the shot you want without showing the edges of your sets, you could try something like this as a quick fix:
http://i196.photobucket.com/albums/aa220/ashexmachina/dioedit.jpg
Not perfect, but it hides the edges of your backdrops. You could even point a light toward the camera to make light look like it's spilling out of the large white area, making it look like they're moving into a much more brightly lit area.
User avatar
YAK_Chewie
Forum Admin
Posts: 22505
Joined: Sun May 07, 2006 4:18 am
Contact:

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby YAK_Chewie » Thu Jan 06, 2011 12:32 am

Wow... great editing of that photo Dan... really makes is pop even more. I'd love to see you dive into a photonovel series of your own.

:wink:
User avatar
blaster_e11
Rebel / Imperial Pilot
Posts: 899
Joined: Thu Jan 25, 2007 10:21 am
Location: Paris, France

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby blaster_e11 » Thu Jan 06, 2011 2:56 am

the frankenstein theme really caught my eye

it's an interesting twist for a SW PN and i love it.

the editing is really good, the pics look great and the customs are neatly painted

great job, man
User avatar
Darth Kikinou
Sith Lord
Posts: 3316
Joined: Tue Oct 24, 2006 6:04 pm

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby Darth Kikinou » Thu Jan 06, 2011 1:53 pm

Thanks everybody!

DOTD, well you just volunteered to do all my special effects, thanks man :-) PM me your email address and we'll get started ;-) I'm just kiddin', but I do need someone. And that someone will go back to this part 1 and snazz it up like you did with that frame (although it's too dark for my taste.) I mean go back once the entire thing is finished. I prefer for the first release to look a little rustic and then go back later and make it look more "finished", like directors do for Blu-Ray releases haha.

Part 2 is just a couple weeks away from release too...

The droid is indeed R2-D2 but you won't really see him do anything significant till part 3. I'm hoping it won't be lame, though there is serious risk of it, but screw it heh.

I was worried about Frunkinsteen too but meh, I thought it'd be fun. Would it better if I changed his name to not be such an obvious play off Frankenstein?

Yah Gunray has the upper hand, Nouk thinks that Gunray is honest and that's why Nute requested him specifically. In fact, who knows, maybe Nouk will fight for the confederacy in the Clone Wars...? Not as a Sith, but as a conscientious objector who feels the official Jedi order has gone corrupt. Think of him as Martin Luther versus the Catholic church in that regard heh. He won't know or won't believe that Dooku is a Sith, think it's Yoda's propaganda. And frankly I don't think he'd be altogether wrong in his views about the order. They're really stupid at the top, Palpatine's rise is all their fault (I mean they enabled it by their myopia and poor decision making.)

Look for part 2 by the end of the month! :-)
----------------------------------------------------
http://www.photonovelalliance.com
The Guardians of Peace and Justice
Episode iii: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5
Lance Quazar
Bounty Hunter
Posts: 1450
Joined: Sat Aug 12, 2006 2:39 pm
Location: Planet Houston
Contact:

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby Lance Quazar » Sun Jan 09, 2011 3:50 am

Well, this is what happens when I disappear from the forum for so long. I miss one of the god damned best photonovel chapters I've ever seen.

DK, this is an epic. A masterpiece. An exceptional piece of work. It is a quantum leap forward in quality from your earlier chapters - which I already loved. I

In terms of both writing and the technical aspects, this is a towering achievement. It's also a friggin' huge chapter -feels like 2 or 3 chapters folded into one. No wonder it took you so darn long to produce this sucker. It's a monster.

The custom and diorama work here is terrific. As others have said, the sheer number of different "sets" really gives us a wonderful sense of scale and space. That station feels like a real place - we are treated to several rooms and locations. Far more than you "needed" to tell the story, but by fleshing it out, you made it immersive and so very real.

Great to see Niubniub's images and even the classic backdrop from Erikstromtrooper's gallery. But the digital enhancements add a lot.

But the Geonosis area is simply amazing. Bravo on that incredible piece of work. I can't imagine how you went around creating that one.

Your custom work has also greatly improved. My favorites are probably the awesome band of gladiators - truly a bad-a$$ bunch. What a terrific action sequence. Again, you put MORE work in here than you could have gotten away with. You could have kept the battles short, but you let them breathe and the results are just awesome.

But none of these technical achievements would matter much if there wasn't a great story here.

One of the things I love about your series is your "alternate history" versions of the backstories of so many characters and events from the Saga. You present such cool alternative scenarios for so many of our characters, I almost always vastly prefer your versions to whatever is "officially" established in the EU. Love how Palpatine sizes up and selects Maul as his apprentice (though I could nitpick the timeline - one year prior to the battle of Naboo hardly seems long enough to give him full Sith training, even if he was an uber bad-a$$ ahead of time.)

And I suspected, even before reading your confirmation, that the droid in question WAS R2. I can kind of figure out how that fits, too. Surely, he will end up going off with the Naboo rescue forces at the end of the story, winding up in Naboo where he will eventually find his way onto Amidala's starship.

The characterizations here are really terrific. Not only do you do a great job with established folks like Palps and the future Separatists, but I really like Nomi. She's adorable and her playful banter with Jif makes her instantly likable.

The plot here really sounds cool. I love the idea of a station overrun by "evil droids" and a rescue mission sent into to rescue the station's survivors. This is an absolutely terrific set-up. It feels (not just because of your quick reference) that we're heading into a story akin to the "Alien" films - sci-fi action, suspense and horror. It's a great premise for a "Star Wars" tale and you have effortlessly woven in your own ideas and creations with some existing characters.

If I had a few nitpicks, they would be this: I dont' really like the use of the Frankenstein names in that scene. It kind of takes me out of the story and undercuts the coolness of the scene with misplaced humor.

I think it's perfectly fine to have that scene be an obvious homage to Frankenstein in terms of story and even dialogue, but I think the names take what is otherwise a genuinely cool, suspenseful scene and make it unintentionally goofy. I think the scene would have been truly scary, but the names harm that a bit.

I also think there are just a few instances where your shot framing could be better. There has definitely been tremendous improvement in this area and most of your shots are indeed gorgeous. A few from older chapters had some really "wide" shots with WAY too much headroom at the top of the frame. There is one shot here which is not great in that regard.

And, as discussed above, the shot of Nomi and Jif in the corridor where we can see the end of the diorama is problematic. I think you can frame and edit your pics a little better to avoid those issues. It's not always easy, given the unforgivingly wide aspect ratio of the camera. You might consider editing down your images into a kind of "Wide screen" style format, so you can have width without all that unwanted height in your images. Something to consider.....

In any event, thanks so much for this truly delightful chapter which is as intriguing and cool a set-up as I can remember seeing in a PN. It's exiting, it's clever, it's full of great characters and dialogue. I just love the hell out of this and I cannot WAIT for the continuation.

Bravo!!
User avatar
Darth Kikinou
Sith Lord
Posts: 3316
Joined: Tue Oct 24, 2006 6:04 pm

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby Darth Kikinou » Sun Jan 09, 2011 3:49 pm

Lance Quazar wrote:In terms of both writing and the technical aspects, this is a towering achievement. It's also a friggin' huge chapter -feels like 2 or 3 chapters folded into one. No wonder it took you so darn long to produce this sucker. It's a monster.


Wow thanks buddy, truly gratifying :-) I know it's very long but I thought I could get away having that many frames (145) because Chewie's last chapter had around that many too ;-) However, I have part 2 ready to go for the end of January, and that one is sitting at 208 frames so what I'm gonna do is take the last scene of part 1 and move it to part 2 and then split part 2 and make it parts 2 and 3, which will be released simultaneously! :-) So yea, parts 2-3 are all shot, the assembly cut is ready, I'm just working on the effects and the writing right now (though assembling the frame order and all pretty much means it's written.)

Great to see Niubniub's images and even the classic backdrop from Erikstromtrooper's gallery. But the digital enhancements add a lot.


That's right, and on the The Photonovel Alliance site I'll be putting links to them and crediting them soon, I only wish I had more hours in the day ;-)

But the Geonosis area is simply amazing. Bravo on that incredible piece of work. I can't imagine how you went around creating that one.


Here ya go :-) http://www.thephotonovelalliance.com/dioramas/Kikinou/Geonosis.html
16$ worth of clay from a high-end art store ;-)

Your custom work has also greatly improved. My favorites are probably the awesome band of gladiators - truly a bad-a$$ bunch. What a terrific action sequence. Again, you put MORE work in here than you could have gotten away with. You could have kept the battles short, but you let them breathe and the results are just awesome.


I really worked hard on the choreography of the fight and I'm really happy with how it turned out. The nature of that diorama, aside from the fact it was taking up valuable space, is that it dried out very quickly and I could only do so much to keep it from cracking (spritzed water on it, etc) so I had to be quick in capitalizing on it. I basically spent the better part of a week (in my free time) just shooting like mad, everything you can think of, I must have taken at least 2,000 snaps, no exaggeration. That scene is also a big-time homage to what is probably my second favorite movie, Gladiator, I snuck in some references to it. For instance, how Maul is just called "The Zabrak", like Maximus is called "The Spaniard". And also some of the shots are straight out of the movie, like when he decapitates the stocky gladiator with the two swords.

I could nitpick the timeline - one year prior to the battle of Naboo hardly seems long enough to give him full Sith training, even if he was an uber bad-a$$ ahead of time.)


Yah that's true, might have to say 2 or 3 years? But then might have to go back to eps 1 & 2 and push those back too. It really doesn't matter to the canon yet.

And I suspected, even before reading your confirmation, that the droid in question WAS R2. I can kind of figure out how that fits, too. Surely, he will end up going off with the Naboo rescue forces at the end of the story, winding up in Naboo where he will eventually find his way onto Amidala's starship.


I'm nervous about how his role coming up will be received, especially since I also have a bit of a silly thing with it too, but if it's *too* bad I can edit it out, but I'm gonna give it a shot.

The characterizations here are really terrific. Not only do you do a great job with established folks like Palps and the future Separatists, but I really like Nomi. She's adorable and her playful banter with Jif makes her instantly likable.


Thanks! :-) As you can guess Nomi is going to be a recurring character going forward and you can thank Chewie for making her so adorable ;-) I was blown away when he sent the pics back to me with the rosy cheeks. All I asked him was to take away the shade from her cheeks because the photography made it look like her cheeks were dirty, and also to fix the eyes since the stock figure made her look high, and he really hit it out of the park, he really dolled her up for me ;-) And Jif, that's all Chewie too. That's a custom I commissioned from him, exceeded my expectations. I'm worried that Jif may remind people of Freelo a little bit in that he's kind of the silly comic-relief sidekick but I hope to make him different enough for him to be a unique character.

The plot here really sounds cool. I love the idea of a station overrun by "evil droids" and a rescue mission sent into to rescue the station's survivors. This is an absolutely terrific set-up. It feels (not just because of your quick reference) that we're heading into a story akin to the "Alien" films - sci-fi action, suspense and horror. It's a great premise for a "Star Wars" tale and you have effortlessly woven in your own ideas and creations with some existing characters.


That's what happens when you live in a fantasy world free to think up all sorts of craziness ;-) I spent months and months trying to reconcile the plot with my fave movie (Aliens) , without making the bad guys aliens, and man you have no idea how happy I am with it, you'll see in parts 2 and 3. But I should tone down the expectations! :-)

If I had a few nitpicks, they would be this: I dont' really like the use of the Frankenstein names in that scene. It kind of takes me out of the story and undercuts the coolness of the scene with misplaced humor.


Okay, that settles it, the verdict is in: drop the name Frunkinsteen. I thought it'd be fun but you're right, it's over-the-top and harms the scene.

A few from older chapters had some really "wide" shots with WAY too much headroom at the top of the frame. There is one shot here which is not great in that regard.


I kept that specifically in mind as I put the assembly cut together, I took your comment about that to heart from last time ;-)

And, as discussed above, the shot of Nomi and Jif in the corridor where we can see the end of the diorama is problematic. I think you can frame and edit your pics a little better to avoid those issues.


I concur but I just wanted the vastness of the corridor to be evident, but yah I'll use DOTD's idea when I release the special edition (lol), but again parts 2 and 3 and then the rest of this episode will be released in the more rustic style, so don't expect it to look as pro as that. The blu-ray release will have all new effects n stuff ;-) heh. Thing is though is I'll need to "hire" an effects guy and last time it cost me a fortune. Chewie did my effects for me this time, dolling up the girl and also putting the lightning and smoke in the frankenstein lab for me (I did all the droid lights heh, yay) and he was so insistent of not taking any compensation it made me feel terrible because he's a father and it took a lot of his time, and I kept asking for revisions, ugh. Eventually I had to force something down his throat by just shipping it to him so he couldn't protest ;-)

In any event, thanks so much for this truly delightful chapter which is as intriguing and cool a set-up as I can remember seeing in a PN. It's exiting, it's clever, it's full of great characters and dialogue. I just love the hell out of this and I cannot WAIT for the continuation.


No, thank you LQ, it's really my pleasure. I kept hoping for a review from you, so thanks a lot ;-) I hope you enjoy parts 2 and 3 coming soon! :-)
Last edited by Darth Kikinou on Thu Jan 27, 2011 1:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.
----------------------------------------------------
http://www.photonovelalliance.com
The Guardians of Peace and Justice
Episode iii: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5
User avatar
Drewton
Moisture Farmer
Posts: 339
Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 7:25 pm
Location: Canada
Contact:

Re: Guardians of Peace and Justice -Episode iii- Part 1

Postby Drewton » Mon Jan 10, 2011 7:56 pm

Phil, a GREAT start to 2011 photonovels. I have to admit that I only just read Part II when you started up The Photonovel Alliance but you have made a big leap in quality here and I will definitely be following every part of Episode III.

Not to say that it was perfect - as always, I have some nitpicks. The photography image quality has really gone up, no out-of-focus shots to be seen here, but like Dan I think you could use some more special effects especially with the "long corridor" with just GIMP. I also wasn't big at all on the Frankenstein scene, which unfortunately came off as more humorous than dramatic, especially with the names and dialogue. Not that it's any worse than having "Burt" and "Larry" as the main characters for a photonovel :P ;) .

I was kind of not so sure about astromechs, protocol, and GNK droids being able to take down living people, but alright, there seemed to be a fair amount of armed droids on the ship. Reminds me of Peragus from KotOR II.

One more critique: I'd recommend to stay away from phrases as Earth-like as "We who are about to die salute you" - anything like this breaks the immersion a little.

The motion blur when the wampa slams a nexu to the ground is very, very nice. Was that blur from while you were filming? The sparks flying at the beginning of the chapter was some good attention to detail too.

The gladiator scene in the arena is absolutely fantastic, one of the best action scenes to be featured in a photonovel. It doesn't follow Maul's EU backstory but it is a good alternate one anyway. You made an awesome diorama and the poses are great. There are still a couple of flaws: that Gunray should maybe recognize Maul later on, but similar thinsg have happened in the movies. And that one year of training seems too short a time to train Maul - maybe this would have been better as a flashback?

Whatever constructive criticism I may have, it was still extremely entertaining and very, very cool so I can't say the flaws detracted too much.
Image

Return to “Photo Novels”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest